Adalante

"You shut your fucking mouth you skinny little faggot."

"What's that? I can't understand you with that cock in your mouth you fat cunt."

The shouting went back and forth. Patty was seated across from me at the table set up for working with clay. She was in a shouting match with her Cousin' Joe Jack, or Billy Bob, or whatever his name was. He stood across the room by the painting easles where a buddy of his was putting the finishing touches on an impressionistic interpretation of Iron Maiden's mascot Eddy.

It was my junior year and I'd transfered to Adalante, a continuation School that was really just a rest stop between high school and prison. The warden, or rather, the art teacher, didn't seem to mind the yelling, in fact he didn't even seem to notice it.

"You're lucky I don't bust your tit you fuckin' moo cow!"

"Oh yeah, well..."

"Uh, hey, Patty, listen..." I interrupted. "I uh, would like to work on my mug here." I was making a warped mug that looked like white brick, which I would glaze 'Pink Floyd The Wall' onto soon enough. "Is it possible that maybe you could go fight with your cousin over there, you know, where he is?"

"What? What the fuck are you saying to my cousin?" Joe Jack yelled at me.

I turned to face him. "Nothing. I just thought that maybe if she was closer to you you guys could hear each other better."

"You think you can talk to my family like that?"

"What? You're kidding me right? I mean, you just called her a cunt."

"WHAT DID YOU SAY! Did you just call my cousin a cunt?"

Oh shit. I was in it. I went back to my mug. When the bell rang Joe Jack stood outside the door waiting for me. I went to the teacher. "Hi Mr. Mudd, I need an escort to the office or something. This big maniac is waiting to beat the shit out of me."

"Sorry. I can't help you."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Surely the principal would help me out. "Well, can you call Mr. Litke at least?"

"Phones broke. But you can go out the back door there." Well, if you're sure. Wouldn't want you to go out of your way or anything, I thought as I stared at the top of Mudd's head. He never even looked up from his newspaper.

I made my way to the door and then I flung it open and ran like hell. I would come around the corner with a head start and I hoped to make it to the principals office before the red neck cousin closed the gap.

Unfortunately he spotted me right away as I started the dash toward the office buidling. I could hear him and the crowd that had gathered around him closing in behind me. I didn't think as I dove through the open office door, turned and threw the door closed just in time to smash my would be attacker in the face. I heard him hit the door hard.

Running into Mr. Litke's office, I whirled around, gripping his door.

"Keith, what's going on?" Litke stood behind his desk.

The moron came running into the office, his nose gushing blood, and he fell for it again. He charged at me, I slammed the door shut and the resulting noise was louder and more satisfying than the first. I locked the door and walked to Mr. Litke's phone.

"Can you tell me what's happening here?" Mr. Litke asked as I dialed.

"Mom it's me. You have to come get me... I'll tell you later, I just need you to come get me now."

Litke went to check out the mess in the outer office. He cleared out the crowd and he left me to catch my breath. I watched for my mom's van through the office window and I bolted for it as soon as she pulled in. Litke was not far behind me.

"What's going on?" my mom asked the confused principal.

"I don't know. Why don't you call me after you get him home." Litke was cool. He had a kid in the nurses office, who would no doubt end up in the emergency room with a broken nose, and he had enough sense to let me get the hell away from whatever was going on. He'd been my principal at the last continuation school too, and we knew each other pretty well. Mostly he knew me as a pacifist and not a shit starter, even if I did have big mouth.

I told my folks I wasn't going back to school. Dad argued until he visited the school.

"Keith's a class clown, not a felon. He doesn't belong here." My dad said to Mr. Litke as we sat at the conference table. A large tinted window looked out on the quad. Many of my classmates looked like adults. They had tattoos and beards, and muscles.

Litke and most of my teacher's agreed with dad. I recieved no disciplinary action for making Joe Jack uglier than he already was and it was decided that I could return to "regular" high school, where, for once in my life, I managed not to get in any fights at all.

Joe Jack, if you're out there, your cousin really is a cunt.